I woke on Wednesday morning with the thought in my head, shouldn't I be having a full pre-assessment today prior to treatment? And, so, after voicing my concerns to Lee I rang St James's day case oncology unit to check. I rang the Oncology day case unit to voice my concerns and put them all in a tizz... as I was told on the phone we'll ring you back. They did and I was told I had to go for preassessment they were sorry when could I get there. I explained my stair carpet was being fitted it would have to be after that. "That's fine just make yourself known when you come to clinic".
It was after one when we arrived at the hospital. There was no appointment. I was asked to take a seat. Then a doctor I'd never seen before came to get me from the waiting room with Lee. "Follow me please, follow me" he wasn't English perhaps Greek I thought. He showed us both to his office and we took a seat. Then his first words were..."Why do you want to see me?" I looked at Lee and he looked pissed off and then I looked at the doctor.
"I have no idea why I'm here. I'm here for pre-assessment" I told him.
"Oh I was told you need a syringe driver and you want to speak about one" Lee was angry and got up.
"I'm gonna go outside darl. I have to go out before I loose it". I nodded I was ready for loosing it myself but I knew Lee was worried he would loose his temper.
The doctor looked up at the door then at me and I just looked at him.
It took a good half an hour to get to the bottom of what was going on. They wanted me to see this doctor prior to my next lot of chemo as they wanted me to have a syringe driver in again to prevent the sickness. It suddenly all made sense. Then he went on to explain about cycles and chemo and to ask if I had any questions. I finally felt like I was being listened too. I explained my worries and why Lee had walked out and told him my fears about missing treatment and he explained how it could be added on. Any cycles I missed they could be added. I called Lee in we and asked for him to explain it to Lee. He came back into the room reluctantly and as the doctor talked I could see him relax. We both listened and went outside it was then that Lee told me he had an appointment with Dr Jagdev....
"What do you mean?"
"I told Louise I wasn't happy, we've to sit and wait she's seeing us soon".
"OK" I sat and we waited.
When we went in it was a mixture of emotions for me, I told her how worried I was at cancelling treatment. How scared I was about the new diagnosis and how terrified I was that I wouldn't be here in time for my wedding in January. She listened and said how sorry she was about the emotions I'd been going through and how a lot of ms-communication had not helped. She also apologised for the comment one tumour or four the outcome and treatment will still remain the same.... that line will ring in my ears for as long as I can remember. Its a comment I can no longer shake off. I then showed Dr Jagdev the paperwork for my ill health retirement pension and what I needed. She was only too glad to look at it and said she would happily fill it in. We left her office a lot happier and clearer about what is going to happen from now on.
No comments:
Post a Comment